I have just had a lot going on lately. Well, actually, I always have a lot going on. Today, my middle child officially became a teenager. I just can't believe he's 13. I seriously feel like I just graduated high school myself and here I am with 2 teenage boys and a little 8 year old princess.
So, when I say I am overwhelmed, that's an understatement. With these kids and their activities and homework, plus the hubby going back to school online, I feel like a single mom of 4! Add the 151 students I teach each day and you can see where the frustration comes in. I am constantly surrounded by kids and don't really have time to take for myself or to spend with other adults.
But, fall break is just one and a half days away and I will get a 5 day mini-vacation from school. However, I have papers and projects to grade before I can break away. My work is never done.
I am really feeling frustrated with the youth that I teach and desperately want them to meet my expectations but I leave so disappointed almost every day. I need a spark to ignite pride and passion in them. It is so hard. I love my subject area but that isn't enough today. They want YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, videos, media, etc. I am not a one-woman entertainment empire but I have to be and I am honestly worn out at 3 pm. So worn out that I can't stand to be around my own children in the afternoons, after they have been with their teachers for most of the day (probably driving them crazy).
I am hoping and praying that these few days of fall break will provide plenty of rest, quality time with my own kids, maybe some arts and crafts time (because that makes me very happy), and just a break from all the running around I normally do - so I can get after it again on Monday.
Be blessed!
Monday, October 15, 2012
Monday, September 17, 2012
I'm frustrated...again. It seems I stay that way. This time, I'm frustrated with television programming. Or, maybe I'm frustrated with myself for watching. Both.
The current trend of reality TV is ridiculous. If it weren't for my boys and their ESPN, I would cut my cable and bank the money. But I can't. Or, more appropriately, I won't.
Now, I've done it before but the boys were small and only watched videos anyway and the hubby was gone all the time with his job. So, why did I need to pay that outrageous cable bill when I could save the money to buy diapers? And for about 6 months, that's what we did.
The kids are older now and would totally fReAk OuT if I cut their cable. But, seriously, have you seen some of the current programming? Of course you have.
Let's talk about TLC. I used to love this channel and, occasionally, it will still offer some quality entertainment. But Honey Boo Boo? Toddlers and Tiaras? What are we doing folks? We are encouraging families to go into debt by exploiting their young children in crazy, glitzy beauty pageants. And we watch it. As for Honey Boo Boo, I'm torn. On one hand, they do seem to love each other and have a nice family unit. However, there's no discipline, no consequences, no manners, and, in my opinion, no morals. My daughter does beauty pageants but she is not allowed to prance around and act "sexy" and I am not going in debt over a dress or entry fees for an 8 year old. We do natural pageants that are not glitz and it is very limited, not a way of life.
Real Housewives of wherever. How "real" are they? They have more money than they know what to do with, get Botox and plastic surgery like it's no big deal, and spoil their children by buying them everything and then don't understand why the children disrespect them.
There are some shows that I do actually like and would miss if I cut my cable but I think with all the technology, Redbox, Netflix, and Internet, I could probably find the show I want to watch. It might be the next season before I see it but I'm OK with that. I'm usually at a ball field anyway, set my DVR and still don't ever watch the show I recorded!
Well, I think I've convinced myself that I don't need cable and I know I could find other things on which to spend that $100 a month. Now, I just need to convince the three boys and the other girl!
Be blessed!
The current trend of reality TV is ridiculous. If it weren't for my boys and their ESPN, I would cut my cable and bank the money. But I can't. Or, more appropriately, I won't.
Now, I've done it before but the boys were small and only watched videos anyway and the hubby was gone all the time with his job. So, why did I need to pay that outrageous cable bill when I could save the money to buy diapers? And for about 6 months, that's what we did.
The kids are older now and would totally fReAk OuT if I cut their cable. But, seriously, have you seen some of the current programming? Of course you have.
Let's talk about TLC. I used to love this channel and, occasionally, it will still offer some quality entertainment. But Honey Boo Boo? Toddlers and Tiaras? What are we doing folks? We are encouraging families to go into debt by exploiting their young children in crazy, glitzy beauty pageants. And we watch it. As for Honey Boo Boo, I'm torn. On one hand, they do seem to love each other and have a nice family unit. However, there's no discipline, no consequences, no manners, and, in my opinion, no morals. My daughter does beauty pageants but she is not allowed to prance around and act "sexy" and I am not going in debt over a dress or entry fees for an 8 year old. We do natural pageants that are not glitz and it is very limited, not a way of life.
Real Housewives of wherever. How "real" are they? They have more money than they know what to do with, get Botox and plastic surgery like it's no big deal, and spoil their children by buying them everything and then don't understand why the children disrespect them.
There are some shows that I do actually like and would miss if I cut my cable but I think with all the technology, Redbox, Netflix, and Internet, I could probably find the show I want to watch. It might be the next season before I see it but I'm OK with that. I'm usually at a ball field anyway, set my DVR and still don't ever watch the show I recorded!
Well, I think I've convinced myself that I don't need cable and I know I could find other things on which to spend that $100 a month. Now, I just need to convince the three boys and the other girl!
Be blessed!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Ugh.
Ugh. We all say it. Right? I hope I'm not the only one. Sometimes I just feel so overwhelmed with everything that it's the only word, or sound, really, that comes out of my mouth. Ugh.
I know that God gives me my strength to do what I do every day but most days I wonder how I even keep going. I wake up, get ready and wake the kids for school. Luckily they are old enough to get dressed and ready themselves. Grab some breakfast, if I'm lucky, as i pack my lunch. Drive to work with my oldest son in tow. The hubby takes the younger two to school since their schools are on his side of town. Teach all day with very little time to even use the restroom. Kids ride the school bus to my school in the afternoons so I take them home only to return to school for band practice, as I am the Auxiliary sponsor for the school band. Most days, my own kids have football, baseball or softball practice, or games, as well, anywhere from 5 pm to 9 pm. Gotta try to fit in a nutritional dinner in there too. Homework, showers, laundry, grading papers, lesson planning all has to fit in sometime after 8 pm. I usually take some with me wherever I go. Whew, I'm exhausted just typing those daily activities!
Now, add in my weekly couponing, which is currently 3 weeks behind, and keeping the house somewhat clean and presentable somewhere in the week. Church on Wednesday pretty much eats up that day for any other activities but we do have overlapping sports practice.
Ugh.
But, I love it. I do. Well, most of it. I love the fact that my children keep me busy. I know where they are and what they are doing and who they are with. I love volunteering and helping children at church on Wednesdays and Sundays. I actually wish I could do more of that. I love the couponing, when I actually get to stay up-to-date because it really does save us quite a bit of money. I don't like cooking but I like it better than spending money on gross fast food.
So, why the "ugh"? Because I get so frustrated with having a job and not being able to do more things like volunteering at the schools and at church or writing more children's books. I often stay up until 11 pm or later getting all the things done on my "to-do" list. I rarely take time for myself and I probably should.
What keeps me going? Definitely God. I could not do all those things without his physical and spiritual guidance. I literally cannot get out of bed on time in the mornings without Him (and my alarm clock). Even though teaching is not exactly where I want to be right now, I know that He knows my path and will lead me where He wants me to go. I enjoy teaching and most days I love my job. However, I constantly think about writing and illustrating. Ugh.
I will gratefully keep pressing on and moving forward with my packed routine. But you might hear an occasional "ugh" along the way.
Blessings to you!
Jen
I know that God gives me my strength to do what I do every day but most days I wonder how I even keep going. I wake up, get ready and wake the kids for school. Luckily they are old enough to get dressed and ready themselves. Grab some breakfast, if I'm lucky, as i pack my lunch. Drive to work with my oldest son in tow. The hubby takes the younger two to school since their schools are on his side of town. Teach all day with very little time to even use the restroom. Kids ride the school bus to my school in the afternoons so I take them home only to return to school for band practice, as I am the Auxiliary sponsor for the school band. Most days, my own kids have football, baseball or softball practice, or games, as well, anywhere from 5 pm to 9 pm. Gotta try to fit in a nutritional dinner in there too. Homework, showers, laundry, grading papers, lesson planning all has to fit in sometime after 8 pm. I usually take some with me wherever I go. Whew, I'm exhausted just typing those daily activities!
Now, add in my weekly couponing, which is currently 3 weeks behind, and keeping the house somewhat clean and presentable somewhere in the week. Church on Wednesday pretty much eats up that day for any other activities but we do have overlapping sports practice.
Ugh.
But, I love it. I do. Well, most of it. I love the fact that my children keep me busy. I know where they are and what they are doing and who they are with. I love volunteering and helping children at church on Wednesdays and Sundays. I actually wish I could do more of that. I love the couponing, when I actually get to stay up-to-date because it really does save us quite a bit of money. I don't like cooking but I like it better than spending money on gross fast food.
So, why the "ugh"? Because I get so frustrated with having a job and not being able to do more things like volunteering at the schools and at church or writing more children's books. I often stay up until 11 pm or later getting all the things done on my "to-do" list. I rarely take time for myself and I probably should.
What keeps me going? Definitely God. I could not do all those things without his physical and spiritual guidance. I literally cannot get out of bed on time in the mornings without Him (and my alarm clock). Even though teaching is not exactly where I want to be right now, I know that He knows my path and will lead me where He wants me to go. I enjoy teaching and most days I love my job. However, I constantly think about writing and illustrating. Ugh.
I will gratefully keep pressing on and moving forward with my packed routine. But you might hear an occasional "ugh" along the way.
Blessings to you!
Jen
Monday, July 16, 2012
Let it go
As I was talking to a friend this morning about an amazing opportunity that was presented to her son, I found myself feeling hot and jealous inside. It is one of those once-in-a-lifetime things that I would love to have happen to one of my children.
I'll be honest - It is so hard to let go of it and just be happy for them. I find myself sulking and feeling sorry for myself, or my kids, that something like that doesn't happen to me or them. I often get depressed or throw myself a pity-party when I see other moms living a life I would like to live - being able to stay home with their children, go on Disney vacations twice a year, or have beautiful golf course homes. Then I remember that it is God who has a plan for me and I can usually get out of my mini-depression and move on with the day.
But it is much harder when it comes to my kids. Why? I know that the same God who has a plan for me also has a plan for them. But, as a mom, I want to control everything I can for them. I mean, I am the one who is here with them on Earth to teach them His word, help them do their best in school and sports, and learn to help others and spread love and peace. So why can't I let this go and let them live out God's plan for them, not mine? Sure, I want what's best for them but at what cost? I cannot go through the day envious that this didn't happen to my child. It will make me physically sick. All I can do is teach them to be better and never stop believing in themselves.
After writing these words, I do have a peacefulness in my heart and I'm truly happy for my friend's son. I am not jealous that this didn't happen to one of my kids. I know that God has a plan for my children and it is my job to raise them in His word and He will direct their paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Count your blessings!
I'll be honest - It is so hard to let go of it and just be happy for them. I find myself sulking and feeling sorry for myself, or my kids, that something like that doesn't happen to me or them. I often get depressed or throw myself a pity-party when I see other moms living a life I would like to live - being able to stay home with their children, go on Disney vacations twice a year, or have beautiful golf course homes. Then I remember that it is God who has a plan for me and I can usually get out of my mini-depression and move on with the day.
But it is much harder when it comes to my kids. Why? I know that the same God who has a plan for me also has a plan for them. But, as a mom, I want to control everything I can for them. I mean, I am the one who is here with them on Earth to teach them His word, help them do their best in school and sports, and learn to help others and spread love and peace. So why can't I let this go and let them live out God's plan for them, not mine? Sure, I want what's best for them but at what cost? I cannot go through the day envious that this didn't happen to my child. It will make me physically sick. All I can do is teach them to be better and never stop believing in themselves.
After writing these words, I do have a peacefulness in my heart and I'm truly happy for my friend's son. I am not jealous that this didn't happen to one of my kids. I know that God has a plan for my children and it is my job to raise them in His word and He will direct their paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Count your blessings!
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Why do I need all this junk?
I was giving a graduation exam today and started thinking. I know, dangerous. But what else am I going to do since I can't write, draw or read anything while I administer that exam? So, I was thinking about all the stuff we accumulate over time and I began to question why we do that. Looking at those high school seniors take that exam and thinking about their futures, I began to reflect on my past. In college, we lived in a dorm. Dorms are tiny. We didn't take every last thing from home and stuff it in that little dorm room. We had clothes, shoes, maybe a computer, books, school supplies, Ramen noodles, and a microfridge. And that was enough. I didn't long for the stuff I had left back home, not that it was much.
Then, I got married. We moved into a small apartment because that's all we could afford at the time, since we were both still in college. I think that's when the accumulation of junk began. I was given bridal showers where I collected dishes, pots and pans, home decor, etc. Then, the family started and we added children, which added more stuff!
I've been fortunate to travel to a few other countries - Mexico, Costa Rica, Spain and France. One thing I've noticed in all of them is that the people are not as attached to things as we are in the U.S. The houses are smaller, if they are lucky enough to have a house. Most live in small apartments or shacks made of any material they can find to provide shelter from the elements. They don't fill their walls with decorator items or even hundreds of family photos. One reason is they simply can't afford it. Their money must be used for food and necessities. Does that mean family isn't important because they don't have dozens of scrapbooks filled with cropped photos and hundreds of dollars of specialty papers and stickers? No. I have witnessed more families sitting outside together, playing together, eating together, working together. I believe their idea of family is much stronger than ours because they don't have all the stuff. No televisions, or maybe just one in the house instead of every room. No gaming systems. No chest full of toys. Bare minimum.
I started in January to "clear the clutter" in my house and in my life but quickly dropped off the bandwagon because life activities got in the way. I long to live simply, without so many physical possessions. After my thinking episode today, I think I'm ready to jump back on. I've got too much stuff and someone else might just need the junk I don't have time for. It's time to clear it out and focus more on people than the things. Plus, it should make my house easier to clean!
Be blessed!
Then, I got married. We moved into a small apartment because that's all we could afford at the time, since we were both still in college. I think that's when the accumulation of junk began. I was given bridal showers where I collected dishes, pots and pans, home decor, etc. Then, the family started and we added children, which added more stuff!
I've been fortunate to travel to a few other countries - Mexico, Costa Rica, Spain and France. One thing I've noticed in all of them is that the people are not as attached to things as we are in the U.S. The houses are smaller, if they are lucky enough to have a house. Most live in small apartments or shacks made of any material they can find to provide shelter from the elements. They don't fill their walls with decorator items or even hundreds of family photos. One reason is they simply can't afford it. Their money must be used for food and necessities. Does that mean family isn't important because they don't have dozens of scrapbooks filled with cropped photos and hundreds of dollars of specialty papers and stickers? No. I have witnessed more families sitting outside together, playing together, eating together, working together. I believe their idea of family is much stronger than ours because they don't have all the stuff. No televisions, or maybe just one in the house instead of every room. No gaming systems. No chest full of toys. Bare minimum.
I started in January to "clear the clutter" in my house and in my life but quickly dropped off the bandwagon because life activities got in the way. I long to live simply, without so many physical possessions. After my thinking episode today, I think I'm ready to jump back on. I've got too much stuff and someone else might just need the junk I don't have time for. It's time to clear it out and focus more on people than the things. Plus, it should make my house easier to clean!
Be blessed!
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Rejuvenated
In my Senior year memory book, under "What I want to be 10 years from now", I have "author". Well, I achieved that in 2007 when I self published a children's book I had written and illustrated. Recently, I have been rejuvenated and re-energized. It seems a lot of things lately are pointing to my dream of writing - little tidbits of advice or inspiration, writing contests randomly showing up in my inbox, favors being asked of me at church, and constant prayer. I am more excited now about writing than I think I ever have been.
God has a way of showing us things in mysterious ways. But sometimes, I think it's not really that mysterious; we just aren't in the right mindset to see it. I'm seeing it now! And I'm excited about what He is going to put in my path to realize my dream.
God is good!
Be blessed!
God has a way of showing us things in mysterious ways. But sometimes, I think it's not really that mysterious; we just aren't in the right mindset to see it. I'm seeing it now! And I'm excited about what He is going to put in my path to realize my dream.
God is good!
Be blessed!
Monday, July 2, 2012
I've missed this.
Well, it has definitely been a while since I last blogged and lots of things have changed. God is still working on His plan for me - some things moving quickly, some taking a bit longer. I have really been thinking about my writing a lot more often and it wasn't until a conversation with a neighbor yesterday that I realized this is really what I want to do. God has given me so many talents - writing, communicating, knowledge of another language, drawing, painting, sewing, creating, teaching - and the best way to utilize all those at once is by writing books/stories/blogs. I am going to deep clean today and look for my notebooks that contain all my sketches, short stories, essays, poems, and start putting it all together. I think by Christmas I can have a good, solid collection. Until my job gets in the way.
I just can't help but believe that it is God's will for me to be a writer. I've wanted to be one since high school. But, it is going to take lots of prayer, lots of willpower (to write instead of goof off on computer games or Facebook), lots of help from my children, and lots of support from my friends and family.
So, having caught you up on where God is leading me, I hope you find where He is leading you. I'll leave you with my favorite Bible verse today, and I may have used it before to close a post, but it's my favorite!
"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and future." Jeremiah 29:11
Be blessed!
http://bookstore.xlibris.com/Products/SKU-0037244017/I-am-a-Positive-Child.aspx
I just can't help but believe that it is God's will for me to be a writer. I've wanted to be one since high school. But, it is going to take lots of prayer, lots of willpower (to write instead of goof off on computer games or Facebook), lots of help from my children, and lots of support from my friends and family.
So, having caught you up on where God is leading me, I hope you find where He is leading you. I'll leave you with my favorite Bible verse today, and I may have used it before to close a post, but it's my favorite!
"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and future." Jeremiah 29:11
Be blessed!
http://bookstore.xlibris.com/Products/SKU-0037244017/I-am-a-Positive-Child.aspx
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